My Dark Joke.

Recently, One Sheet has been involved in publishing his autobiography, since his fame has hit fever pitch after the recent advertisements. In this epic book, he has been letting readers see his family for the first time through his own eyes.

He documents the history of his protective mother, Oh Sheet, and his workaholic father, Tough Sheet. He was also thoroughly proud to announce his two sons, one is a professional animal fighter, Bull Sheet, and the other is a scientist who loves to state the obvious, affectionately named No Sheet. He was extremely proud of his diverse family, but also managed to make time to mention those who are more distant.

His cousin is a great example. Being a deeply religious main of the Christian Faith, One Sheet always goes to his cousin, a priest, for spiritual advice. His cousin, father Holy Sheet. He also gives his attention to the poorer side of his family, offering aid to his brother-in-law, Jack Sheet. His family isn't always so benevolent.

There is a thief in the Sheet family. One who has lied through his teeth to keep him safe. He is known only to the populace by the nickname "Whataloada" Sheet. His first name has never been discovered. There is also his Father's sister, who works as a sexual torturer. She goes by the name, Horny Sheet.

These names were, interestingly, removed in the published work. When asked if he had another relative he'd like to mention, One Sheet looked down with a sigh and spoke of his third, deceased son, Whogivesa Sheet.