Quoting Eurospore

Mormon visitor when offered a whisky and soda: "May I have water, Sir Winston? Lions Drink it."
Churchill: "Asses drink it too."
Second Mormon: "Strong drink rageth and stingeth like a serpent!"
Churchill: "I have long been looking for a drink like that."

Churchill: "Prof., pray calculate the amount of champagne and spirits I have consumed in my life and indicate how much of this room they would fill?"
Prof Lindeman, pretending to calculate with his slide ruler: "I'm afraid not more than a few inches, Winston."
Churchill: "How much to do, how little time remains!"

The Terminator wrote:Come with me if you want to live.

The Terminator wrote:Hasta la vista, baby.

People talk about sovereignty like it's like losing your virginity, you only loose it once. That's wrong

Don’t let your victories go to your head, or your failures go to your heart.

Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.

The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work unless it’s open.

"I've often said: the only thing standing between me and greatness... is me."

"It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens."

"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."

"Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem."

"To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness."

"I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car."

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes."

Urgl

Urgl Burgl

Urgelth to the Burgleth

Blop

butt

buttz

buttface

monkeybutt

grrr

Dormin wrote:Lol, Remi I love those. Nice choice.

Oh, can we quote ourselves?

If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide.
--- Mohandas Gandhi

“-She turned me into a newt!
-A newt?
-I got better...
--- Monty Python (The Holy Grail)

I’ve never been to an Al-Qaeda Christmas party, but I have seen the invites. No music, no dancing, but we promise the fastest game of pass the parcel you’ve ever seen.
--- Omid Djalili

It's the most important decision I've had to make since 1978 when I decided to get a bikini wax.
-- Arnold Schwarzenegger

“If you are cold, tea will warm you; if you are too heated, it will cool you; if you are depressed, it will cheer you; if you are excited, it will calm you.”
--- William E. Gladstone

Trickatel wrote:You forgot the buns of Saki.

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cozy, doesn't try it on.
--- Billy Connolly

Nancy Astor: If I was your wife, I'd poison your coffee.
Winston Churchill: If I was your husband, I'd drink it.

Andrew Brown
The Internet is so big, so powerful and so pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life.

Cole Sear wrote:I see dead people.

Jack Torrance wrote:Here's Johnny!

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Davy Jones: "You can do nothing without the key!"
Jack Sparrow: "I already have the key!"
Davy Jones: [shows the key] "No you don't."
Jack Sparrow: "Oh, that key."

Zim: Come, GIR. Let us rain some doom down upon the heads of our doomed enemies.

Zim: Be gone with you! I've had enough of your nonsense from your smelly mouth filled with... corn!

Dib: You can't make me look! I'll just shut my eyes.
Zim: Oh, you'll open them. You have to breath sometime.
Dib: No, I - Wait... What do eyes have to do with breathing?

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.
-- Muhammad Ali

Skill is successfully walking a tightrope over Niagara Falls. Intelligence is not trying.
-- Anonymous

God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
-- Voltaire

Lord Cutler Beckett: You're mad!
Jack Sparrow: Thank goodness for that because if I wasn't, this'd probably never work.

Christopher Russell
It is noticeable that in all the discussions about the femininity of God, the masculinity of the Devil goes unchallenged. This is unfair and revealing.

Stephen Fry
We've all met people who are supposedly incredibly intelligent but don't know which way to sit on a lavatory.

Steven Wright
Right now, I'm having amnesia and de ja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.

John Cleese as Basil Fawlty
May I ask what you were expecting to see out of a Torquay bedroom window? Sydney Opera House, perhaps? The Hanging Gardens of Babylon? Herds of wildebeest sweeping majestically by?